My dog is gross

Ok so after making a fantastic fire Tom and I noticed a stain on the rug in front of the door. Strange that we didn't notice it before, but we are not always as observant as we should be. Tom looked at it and announced that Harper had obviously peed. I was hesitant to believe this seeing as Harper has not peed in the house since he marked on the Hodgman's couch because Tom's cousin's dog was over. That was over 4 years ago.

Not one to be grossed out by dog bodily functions, I got down at nose level and sniffed the spot. Pee? Nope. Puke spot? Yes. And where might that puke have gone you ask? Back down into Harper's belly of course. If it comes out looking like food, you might as well snarf it back down again.

With that said it brings to mind the disturbing fact that Harper continues to randomly puke. I was trying to describe this to someone yesterday (I'm sure they were NOT interested), and I realized that he hadn't been making that awful retching sounds that dogs make when they puke. You know, when you can actually hear their stomach swaying back and forth like a stormy ocean. So I decided (stupid) to look this up on the internet.

Now I have been bombarded with information categorizing Harper's "pukes" into regurgitations which are potentially caused by such a variety of diseases and problems that I will be unable to sleep tonight. My hope is that it is some stupid piece of bone that will dislodge itself. My fear is that it is something awful, or god forbid operable (this would make operation #3).

To make matters worse, after discovering this possible life-altering information, Harper happily chewing on his mini-kitty glow ball (if you don't know what that is only ask me if you want the 45 minute story), suddenly just ATE the freaking ball. He has been playing and chewing on it for about a year and never once seemed interested in eating it, but tonight of all nights, he just up and SWALLOWED it. Tom was incredibly unhappy and said, "BAD!" to which Harper replied by licking his face.

I would say there is a 99.9% chance of puking or regurgitating or whatever the hell it is in the next 24 hours. Will keep you posted.